Winter solstice! People don’t usually know its significance. But each of us, are astrologically aligned to let things die, burn, and renew ourselves and situations for the better. This period astronomically marks the beginning of shortening nights and lengthening days. People celebrate with friends, families-things slow down, people indulge in good drink and food, lots of music and dancing, and of course, the burning of fire!
“Fire [is but one of our earthly elements, and] represents our passions, compulsion, zeal, creativity, and motivation (as in, “put a fire under it!”). The Element of Fire has great power for forging will and determination. It is our inner light as well as a living symbol of the Divine fire that burns in every soul.” Fire represents our motivations toward being better.
Fire is burned to illuminate and cleanse away bad energy. It is used ritualistically to get rid of anything which didn’t serve us during the year. People perform rituals to burn away bad karma, relationships, lack, disappointments, and make clear intentions towards what they’d like for themselves.
During this winter solstice, regardless of belief or religion, remember to clear your aura, environment, mind, energy, and body of toxins which doesn’t serve us. Let it burn!
I had a conversation with an old friend today, about loving a person. We search for love in the most common places-never truly understanding all which it entails, or how we can really feel fulfilled by the love we seek. For anyone seeking love, know this-self first. It is easy to find “love”. Later, you may find that that’s not what you had in mind. Some of us don’t know the difference between love and lust. The latter is short term. For deeper connections, you want the verb, that being, action oriented idea that the partner you find wants to build something meaningful with you.
Finding love must be intentional. However, to maintain a healthy balance, it must first be met with a centered starting place. And that is, a place where the love is radiating from self. Self care, appreciation, esteem, and knowing what you will and will not accept. We all have nuances of what we can accept from a partner. And yours and mine may be different, and that is okay. Know what your limits are-remind yourself of what your needs are. And do not compromise upon that. While there will be space to compromise in any relationship, there should be limits upon which you will not negotiate. For if you do, you’ll regret it later. Stay true to yourself, and remain open to learn and understand.
You are lovable, worthy of love and emotional balance. However, expecting another to balance you, or your love is delusional. One must find emotional balance by accepting and loving oneself first. Otherwise, you give what you do not have. What you’ll project, and yearn for, will come from a place of desperation and want. You, lacking in self love, can only give a burdensome version of need. It does not become you. The next time you feel like you need love, practice self love. Attract the love you want.
Self love practice:
- Tell yourself how much you love yourself.
- Languish in your hygiene and beauty regiments: Take extra care to focus on your bathing, lathering yourself; washing off the dark energy which has got you down; let your hands hold yourself and give gratitude for each part of you. Take time to lotion and oil your entire body afterwards-always in the direction towards your heart. If you wear make-up, take your time. Moisturize your face, stroking upwards. Smile all the while. Continue to tell yourself how beautiful is each inch of you.
- Dress in your best, flattering attire, depending on what your next move.
- Get a massage, or day at the spa. Get a manicure/pedicure.
- Go for a walk with yourself.
- Go out to lunch with yourself.
- Sit under a tree or sunbathe, or sit by the beach, replaying all your accomplishments. By the way, if you are at this point, you’ve accomplished much!
- Stay off social media. Just don’t check it.
- Declare to your friends and family that this is your, “Love on ME day”! (When your energy of attraction begins to flow, your phone may begin to go off-you’re doing it, attracting others with all this love energy; but don’t stop your vibe; disregard non-emergency messages and focus on self.)
- In between this meditation, repeat to yourself: I am love; I am ready to receive love; I deserve love. I am lovable. I love ME!
We’ve all heard the adage, be yourself. As if people have an alternate choice than being themselves. What someone really means when they tell another person to be him or herself is, “Whoever you’re reflecting right now is not you.” Usually, this correction comes from adult to child. However, it is also given to friends from friends, to audiences from “experts”, and even to patients from counselors. But what is that? How are we to know when we’re not ourselves? We continue to try to fit ourselves in molds which we believe to be our true selves. It comes from beliefs, morals, our values, and even our upbringing. However, I believe that all the facets we are, in different situations, are our true selves. Embrace your selves. For you are not just what you think. You are ever flowing, growing, learning and evolving. Being yourself, is many things. And that’s okay.